I’m at that irritating place that everybody is very familiar with called SELF-DOUBT.
In the last hour I have considered and reconsidered a million times whether I have the capacity to fulfil one of my top goals in 2015: start working as a model, do commercials and voiceover work.
This goal involves taking such a huge leap of faith and stepping into unfamiliar territories. Self-doubt is a complicated emotion, so I want to analyse how I got here and understand why I’m still here.
To move forward and get out of this rut, I need to look at my thoughts and change them so I can get to wherever I want to go, rather than downward-spiralling into idleness and self-pity.
First of all, let me work on the “why”. I was feeling doubtful because I lack experience and knowledge about these new industries. Second, my goal is job-related and therefore partially dependent on someone else, i.e. an employer.
Typically, every employer in the entertainment business has a certain image or particular characteristics a potential employee must have. In other words, they can be extremely picky.
However, my main concern was that I would never be what they were looking for and that I wouldn’t be able to deliver when given the opportunity. This way of thinking had a negative effect on my self-confidence.
In terms of the “how” I already know the answer: I got into this state simply because I let myself get there. Thoughts were created in my own mind, based on fear, and I let that fear take root.
Yes, it is true that I lack experience but that shouldn’t be an excuse to feel doubtful or substandard. Everyone has to start from somewhere, and it is those who choose to see a lack of experience as a challenge that end up successful in their pursuits.
A lack of knowledge is no reason to give up. Knowledge is everywhere, and given that I have both a working laptop and a Wi-Fi connection, much of that knowledge is at my disposal.
Lastly, I know who I am and what I am capable of. If an employer won’t offer me a job after thoroughly considering my skills, that isn’t my problem. It may just mean that someone else would benefit from the opportunity more than me, and that too is ok.
As long as I remain optimistic about my future and believe that I am capable of achieving, success becomes inevitable. I think that is the most useful and positive way to look at the situation.
I just exhaled.
I feel so much better.